Monday, January 30, 2006

what one of my friends has to say

When I was a kid I used to read through the dictionary. I would like to say it was because I was so smart and books bored me, but it was mostly so I could learn new ways of saying foul words. Despite that, I do like new words, and when I come across them I try to store them away for later reflection. One I came across most recently is "albedo". My source says, "the albedo of an object is its optical reflectivity, i.e., the extent to which it reflects light."Now out of the dictionary... I dont think I have a great albedo. Over the past few weeks, months, and some years, I have noticed myself reflecting more and more the shadow of the other terrestrial objects around me than the light of the Son. Sure the terrestrials have their own beauty, but they really fall short without the light of the Son. And without reflecting the Son, I have no nourishment for the things I need and slowly grow pale and waste away. --EJ smith

poem for today

"This is the Garden," by E.E. Cummings

this is the garden: colours come and go,
frail azures fluttering from night's outer wing
strong silent greens serenely lingering,
absolute lights like baths of golden snow.

This is the garden: pursed lips do blow
upon cool flutes within wide glooms, and sing
(of harps celestial to the quivering string)
invisible faces hauntingly and slow.

This is the garden. Time shall surely reap
and on Death's blade lie many a flower curled,
in other lands where other songs be sung;
yet stand They here enraptured, as among
the slow deep trees perpetual of sleep
some silver-fingered fountain steals the world.

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Emily Dickinson said,

"Not knowing when the dawn will come, I open every door."

Why do you say, O Jacob, and complain, O Israel, 'My way is hidden from the LORD; my cause is disregarded by my God'? Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. Isaiah 40:27-31 NIV

Sunday, January 22, 2006

the latest adventure

This weekend I was 'kidnapped' and taken to an unknown location for my surprise belated birthday celebration...and it was definitely worth the wait. Four friends and I stayed in a condo (for free...aunt of a friend of a friend) in Estes Park for the weekend. Saturday we got up and went into town, rented snowshoes (only $10/ea for snowshoes and poles; not surprisingly, I was given a smaller pair than all the others), and went to Bear Lake in Rocky Mountain National Park (one of the friends has a pass, so instead of paying $20, we got in free). We snowshoed for about 1.5 miles. Not really long, but I wasn't up to as much as I wanted to since being sick has taken its toll. Anyway, it's one of the funnest things I've ever done. And GORGEOUS. The coolest thing to me is that I hiked the same trail back in August (or maybe July; can't remember now), but seeing it completely different, with the lake frozen over and the mountains donning snow drifts was glorious. It was definitely a hit, something we'll do again, and something everyone enjoyed, which is always nice.
The rest of the weekend we took it easy. We read some, cooked dinner, played some games. This morning, we got up and went out for breakfast. Three of the girls went back to Denver, while a friend and I stayed in Estes and shopped some, then stopped in Boulder to catch part of the game, then shopped some more and came back to Denver to watch more football.
All in all, a pretty awesome weekend doing something I've never done before, but will more than likely do several more times this winter.

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

I'm It (again)

four things
So I was tagged and wanted to share my answers.
A friend of mine declared this The Longest Week Ever. I have to agree.

Four jobs you have had in your life:
Rush's Fast Food Restaurant
Camp Winshape: Summer Counselor
Served Dinner to an elderley lady (two nights a week;$19/hr.)
Administrative Assistant to Professor/Librarian/Admissions Counselor (current job: all-three-in-one)

Four movies you would watch over and over:
Cutting Edge
Tommy Boy
13 Going on 30
Lucky Seven

Four places you have lived:
Cola, SC
Auburn, AL
Mill Valley, CA
Denver, CO

Four TV shows you love to watch:
Extreme Makeover – Home Edition
Clean Sweep
Ed (when it was still on; Love Monkey as new replacement)

Four places you have been on vacation:
Paris, France
Chicago, IL
Seattle, WA
Balitmore, MD

Four websites I visit daily:
Blogs of friends
Craisglist (almost daily)
Yahoo (for my music)

Four of my favorite foods:

Four places I would rather be right now:
San Francisco
Pescadero (lighthouse)
Little Italy restaurant in Paris
anywhere with Sarah or my mom

So now I tag BrokedownMelody and Jellystonephilosopher and LateNiteThinker

Monday, January 16, 2006

Horse Therapy

I had a most interesting experience yesterday. I went with the staff and residents of the transitional home I live and work with to horse therapy. It was at a lady's house. She has two horses. One of her friends brought two more horses. This lady is a counselor/psychologist/therapist/something-like-that. Apparently, this technique is gaining in popularity. Getting around horses is supposed to bring out these deep and meaningful observations about people. Do I sound like I think it's good?
To give a little background, I am indeed from the South, but was raised in the suburbs/city, NOT in the country. I've never owned a pet in my life and I've never really been around animals (I don't count the zoo, aquarium, circus, or my sister ;)). I realize that animals are God's creation. I realize that they have their place and I think we as humans have our place and the two shouldn't necessarily mix (unless you call mixing me digesting said animal after it's cooked to my liking).
So being around horses was a new experience for me. I was quite hesitant.
In the end, I learned some stuff and was reminded about more stuff, too.
The topic for the day was non-verbal and verbal communication. So there were questions about what we thought the horses were 'saying.' Of course, I was thinking, they're not saying anything; horses don't talk (Mr. Ed, of course, the exception). But it was quite interesting to then hear the single moms talk about their boundaries and how they saw the same thing in the horses. I really did try and keep an open mind.
Interestingly, the counselor lady had us go into the fenced in area, but still away from the horses. She says, so what do you feel like you feel like getting a little closer? I say, I'm here to do what you say. She says, well, I'm not here to tell you what to do. It's all about what you're comfortable with. If you say you don't want to do something, then fine. Of course, I know what she's up to and really, she did tell us what to do. We proceeded to get closer to the horses, then we broke up into twos and got a brush and groomed the horses. I was thinking if I really had a and a good book by a nice cozy fireplace would be the ideal, but I digress.
So then as we're grooming the horses (one person on one side, another person on the other side) we're to tell of a recent painful experience. The other person listening is then to ask three questions.
At the debriefing, the question was asked, 'so how did you feel about discussing the painful experience while brushing the horse?' Everyone (but me) said it was easier because the horse was in between and created more of a safe environment. I didn't like it because I couldn't concentrate as much, as well as the fact that I couldn't see the other person's face, which is huge for me in communicating in person. So it was frustrating. It was harder for me to come up with the 'painful experience' standing there doing something else. I kept thinking, ok am I brushing the horse or am I talking about something. It felt like the other person didn't care as much because they were doing something else while (or to me, instead of) listening.
The moms seemed to get some out of it and went farther with the horses this time than last, which is good.
That's all I have to say about that for now.

Thursday, January 05, 2006

my favorite

had to share my favorite quotes from my grandmother and mother (respectively) while with them for the past two weeks...

after answering the question that my grandmother refuses to stop asking EVERY time I am with her concerning whether i've found a guy, am dating a guy, or any version of such in the negative (my latest answer being 'i haven't found him, yet' although i think starting now i'll change it to 'he hasn't found me, yet') she responds,
'well, there are worse things than being an old maid.'

my mother speaking of the way christmas turned out this year: (not to her liking because she was still recovering from my sister's wedding in early november) 'christmas will be the way i'd like it next year, unless there's another wedding before then.'
to which i begin laughing, realizing that she was implying the wedding of yours truly. i immediately reminded her that i'm not even in a relationship at the moment, and this time last year, my sister was in relationship with her now-husband and it was already getting serious. puh-le-hease...
not that i wouldn't mind, but that's quite hard to imagine at this point and time.

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

Psalm 100

A Psalm for Thanksgiving.
1 Shout joyfully to the LORD, all the earth.
2 Serve the LORD with gladness;
Come before Him with joyful singing.
3Know that the LORD Himself is God;
It is He who has made us, and not we ourselves;
We are His people and the sheep of His pasture.
4Enter His gates with thanksgiving
And His courts with praise
Give thanks to Him, bless His name.
5For the LORD is good; His lovingkindness is everlasting
And His faithfulness to all generations.


Will You Go Out Without Knowing?
He went out, not knowing where he was going —Hebrews 11:8
Have you ever "gone out" in this way? If so, there is no logical answer possible when anyone asks you what you are doing. One of the most difficult questions to answer in Christian work is, "What do you expect to do?" You don’t know what you are going to do. The only thing you know is that God knows what He is doing. Continually examine your attitude toward God to see if you are willing to "go out" in every area of your life, trusting in God entirely. It is this attitude that keeps you in constant wonder, because you don’t know what God is going to do next. Each morning as you wake, there is a new opportunity to "go out," building your confidence in God. ". . . do not worry about your life . . . nor about the body . . ." ( Luke 12:22 ). In other words, don’t worry about the things that concerned you before you did "go out."
Have you been asking God what He is going to do? He will never tell you. God does not tell you what He is going to do— He reveals to you who He is. Do you believe in a miracle-working God, and will you "go out" in complete surrender to Him until you are not surprised one iota by anything He does?
Believe God is always the God you know Him to be when you are nearest to Him. Then think how unnecessary and disrespectful worry is! Let the attitude of your life be a continual willingness to "go out" in dependence upon God, and your life will have a sacred and inexpressible charm about it that is very satisfying to Jesus. You must learn to "go out" through your convictions, creeds, or experiences until you come to the point in your faith where there is nothing between yourself and God.